Well I'm currently in my last week of my trip, I'm currently in Philadelphia or in a small town around the city anyway, staying with my friend Rachel-Ann and her family, they're a great bunch of WoW players yesterday they helped my Hunter traverse the Deadmines in Westfall, that was good fun and we came out with a lot of good loot too.

We'll be going to the I-con convention in New york soon, it'll be my first convention ever and I'm so looking forward to it because I'm going to get to meet Isabel Marks and Terrence Marks, Artist and writers of Namir Deiter and various other webcomics, While I could call these two my heros in some sense I actually owe these two a lot more then I let on sometimes, was it not for them I would not have the friends, the urge to visit them or read as many webcomics as I do now.

Thats the good part of this, now the more... dis-likeable part, but I write this not because of desire or wanting to make a point but to express how confused I have been the last week or so.

I just dont know where it all went wrong how it all just fell apart on me, on us and I wish I knew where it did go wrong, and why we couldn't work anything out or give it the chance at the very least. And what caused all this... just some internet flirting just anything liked you'd see between two good friends in real life, on-line, cyber, 1's and 0's, a place where physical meaning holds no value over the net other than the fact it's text, I wanted to be honest but instead it just started the down fall, I tried to explain myself but only to be told it was no longer committed, I had to live with it I tried to live with it and hang onto a golden thread that I'd hope I could be given, but just recently that thread was cut on me and told it was never to be, but I was never told why other than just being told they didn't want it, perhaps I came on too hard with that matter I was a bit expressive sometimes I tried to apologize and said I respected the decision, maybe we wernt ready or something I dont know I was left in darkness with little reason but I dont hate them for it and hoped we could be friends in the mean time, but even after that I discover that things were deemed worse by them believing something that is not true at all and just misunderstood, a thing I would never do and it just seemed to make matters worse, I was told I shouldn't go ballistic or anything or jump to conclusions of my own, which I'm not there has to be reason for their actions but I was confused more and more, I dont have any excuse other than the fact I know nothing of love or what to do and what not to do but now it seems I know little of how to be a friend to some.

I want to learn from these mistakes and make it up to them, I have learned what I can but I feel like I've done something so wrong I just wish to rectify it, but i can't do that unless I can talk and work things out, things dont always fix them selves, I am told time heals all wounds which can be true but if left too long it can just scar.

I'm not unreasonable, I'm not a liar I never am, I'm always open minded and will listen to reason if given the chance. I'm just a confused young man with little understanding or experience of the concept of love I cant give any other excuse than that, and I just dont want things to end the way they have, I'll wait like I always have but it's not down to me anymore...

That is all.

And bro if you post on this entry or even mention it back home I'll throttle you when i get back, understood, I dont need mom worrying any more than she needs to?